Many alcoholics in early recovery want to know how to stay sober without going to meetings or rehab.  There are a number of reasons that people feel this way, and in some cases, their reason for feeling this way can help to reveal some of the answers.

For example, some people do not want to go to rehab or to meetings because they have anxiety.  They self medicate with alcohol because it helps to loosen them up around other people, and they actually feel socially comfortable when they are heavily buzzed.  This is a problem when they sober up, because now their “liquid courage” is gone and they are once again anxious around other people.  This can be especially true for being in front of crowds of people, or being forced to speak in front of them.  This, of course, is exactly what happens at most rehabs and at AA meetings: you speak in front of other people.  There is really no way to avoid this as it is a huge part of the therapeutic element.

Now to some extent, when I finally got clean and sober, I had to face these fears even though I had anxiety about talking in groups of people.  I was miserable enough with my drinking that I was willing to face the fear anyway, and go to rehab and attend meetings.  I even spoke at many, many meetings over the first two years.

I think this was probably necessary for me, because part of getting and staying sober was getting past this anxiety I had.  There was no way to stay sober in the long run if I was going to be a nervous wreck the whole time.  So this was a hurdle that I had to get past.

Now the key here is that meetings and speaking in front of groups is not necessary to stay sober.  Many, many people will disagree with this.  They disagree because they have found a solution that works for them in going to AA meetings on a regular basis.  Most of the people in AA will tell you that if you stop going to meetings, you are doomed to relapse.  This is not necessarily true, as I have not been to a meeting for about 8 years now, and I know many others in recovery who do not use 12 meetings as a means of sobriety.

Now please understand that I am not bashing AA or meetings here.  That is not my point at all.  What I am saying is that you can stay clean and sober without them.  How?

My method for recovery involves holistic growth.  That just means that I am always pushing myself to grow in many different areas of my life.  One area is spirituality, but there are other, equally important areas.  For example, I think daily, vigorous exercise is a HUGE part of staying clean and sober.  Those who do not exercise in recovery are missing out on a huge secret.  When you exercise on a regular basis, it just has so many benefits in terms of mental and emotional health, many of which are too difficult to quantify and document, but they are there nonetheless.

If it is fear that keeps you from rehab or meetings, I would still challenge you to face that fear, at least in early recovery, in order to grow from it.  You do not have to condemn yourself to a life of meetings if you do not want to, but you can still get huge benefit from breaking through this fear.  I would challenge anyone who is struggling with alcoholism to at least go through a medical detox, because it can be dangerous not to do so.